I want a Natural birth not a Normal birth

It was my dream! I desired to give birth in a natural way, just how a woman is designed to give birth. So my body gets what it truly deserves.Yes! It’s possible even today.

This was my second pregnancy. My first baby was delivered normally. By experience I had realized that normal birth isn’t really normal. During my first delivery I was induced. It was a medicated vaginal delivery and I was injected with glucose, painkillers and other stuff. My baby was vacuumed out of my body. ( All of the above for whatever medical reasons ) How on earth is that normal I thought!

A little bit of reading helped me realize that what I really wanted was a natural birth. A birthing experience with no drugs or medical intervention. A birth in its purest form. This time around I was a woman informed.

Finding the right people

I was determined to have a natural birth. All I needed to do was find the right people to help me achieve it. Easier said than done actually!

I came across The Health Awareness Centre in Worli, Mumbai headed by Dr. Vijaya Venkat. She educated me on the importance of having an alkaline environment in the body which helps its innate intelligence to release the necessary hormones and produce the crucial vitamins necessary before and during pregnancy. Our body has an ability to heal and restore balance if it is supplied with the right nutrition coupled with rest and positive thoughts.

They introduced me to an organization called ‘Birth India’ which was spreading awareness about natural birthing in India, under the direction of Mrs. Ruth Malik. I borrowed her contact from a friend and spoke to her, sharing my experince of the first delivery, I expressed my desire to deliver naturally and requested her to help me with the right guidance to pull it off.

She lent a patient ear and asked me to share my email id so she could pass on necessary information. I could experience her compassionate energy. I thanked her and hung up the phone and the next minute I receive a message from her asking for my email id. I was pleasantly surprised and immediately responded back. Then there was an instant ping! An elaborate email with a detailed list of all contacts related to natural birthing across the country.

I started reaching out to the Gynecologists, doulas and midwives in Mumbai to share my birth plan. With Ruth’s consultation, I concluded that according to the current state of affairs a combination of water birthing at Surya Hospital, Khar under the guidance of Dr. Ameet Dhurandhar and Doula Ms. Sanam Motwani was the best bet. I was not considering a home birth and there were no midwives in the city at that time.

The pregnancy

Someone who has already experienced labour pain, knows that it aint easy. I managed it the first time around and I could do it again too, but I would not deny that I was extremely fearful. Even though I was so sure that I wanted to have a natural birth, I wasn’t feeling too confident. And honestly, the ability to take the pain is all about the mental make up. I knew it needed to change. I spoke to a very dear friend of mine Ms. Mansi Ashta who recommended me to read a book on Hypnobirthing by Marie Mongan. This book brought about a shift in my thought process or I should say, it just changed me as a person. A wave of comfort and ease starting passing through my body as I kept reading each page and my confidence levels reached some unexpected highs. I started trusting my body, loving my body and focusing on rest. Basically just letting go, trusting your body’s ability to do what it has to and responding to your instincts.

The 2 important ingredients - Exercise and Rest

I cant stress enough on the importance of physical exercise in pregnancy, but choosing a plan that isn’t too exhausting for the body is important. And swimming tops the list. I went swimming every single day of my pregnancy right upto the D day. Every day I had surprised, concerned and eyes full of awe staring at this woman in full bloom entering the pool. Waking up at 7am every morning and swimming 400metres in 35 minutes every day. Swimming every morning gave me positive energy through the day and also helped calm my otherwise highly active mind.

I tried taking massages on alternate day. This really helped soothe my muscles. Also, since hypnobirthing focuses a lot on rest, this was a beautiful way to relax.

Of course, this was supported by a rich diet high on fruits, vegetables, nuts and occasional gobble sessions. We need that too!

Pregnancy felt like a breeze. I sat on the floor most of the times, carried my 3 year old daughter, travelled whenever I wanted to and did everything that was against the norm. I was not sick, I was pregnant.

The Due Date Dramatics!

My due date was 25th December. I went in for a sonography in the last week and it seemed fine!

We met our gynac who exclaimed that since there were no signs of labour yet, we needed to exercise caution since I had a history of placenta calcification during my first pregnancy. He discussed that we might require to do a membrane sweep. I was extremely hesitant. I wanted the labour to start naturally. I wouldn’t have it another way! My husband made a call to the Radiologist to gain more clarity on the situation. It was a Grade 2 calcification moving on to Grade 3 and since this report had a validity of one week, we could take a chance and wait. We shared this with our Gynac who agreed and did an internal check up and was happy to find that the baby’s head hadn’t come down yet and a membrane sweep wouldn’t help anyways.

It is important for pregnant women to know the general interventions involved during pregnancy, so they make informed choices. Dr. Ameet and I always discussed all necessary interventions like a team. He never made a big deal about the Due Date and my research had helped me understand that the due date really doesn’t mean anything and that its definitely ok to cross it if not before. I cant thank him enough for this. I had crossed my Due date by now.

Medical intervention when necessary

There was another development. My iron levels were low. I wanted a drug free pregnancy and did not take any supplements throughout. My food was my drug. My last blood report revealed that the levels were not favourable for a water birth. The doc explained that it was risky to have a natural birth with such low readings and we would need to administer Pitocin post the delivery to avoid excessive bleeding. If not taken, it could put my body in a state of shock. This however would be given only after the baby and the placenta was delivered and would not interfere with the delivery. I was hesitant, but this time he put his foot down and said that he cannot take this chance.

I was really unhappy with this and spoke to a couple of midwives and a few like minded friends and discussed this condition. Most people said that since I was under a Gynac who has always been ever supporting a natural birth, it was important for me to surrender to my doc and let him function with confidence and trust.

The D day

It was 27th Dec' 17. A regular day. Regular swimming sessions, shopping and other last minute drills right! In the evening I felt a weird discomfort and pain, but I let it go. I came home and told my husband, “looks like tonight’s the night”. He took it quiet seriously! He had no choice. However, the night just passed in anticipation like many others. The next morning I started to feel some contractions. I was confused if they were contractions or just some kind of pain. I called my team (doc n Doula) and explained what was happening. The asked me to keep calm and observe the pains. That day happened to be a family lunch and I binged on my favourite Chinese food .I thoroughly enjoyed that meal, but something was up. These pains weren't normal.I called my husband whose immediate response was to rush back home, but I resisted suggesting that we should wait and observe.

The surges were erratic and untimely. I was perplexed and called my doctor to confirm if there were contractions. He just asked me to stay calm. I decided to take a nap in the afternoon.

I woke up after an hour and resumed my usual evening activities. Playing with my older daughter. By late evening, the contractions had begun to form a pattern with a gap of exactly 45 mins.

I called the doc again at about 8:30 pm and he said that I seem to be in labour but it's early labour and I need not hurry to the hospital.

How could I ?!?

This was the first time I was going to spend a night away from my daughter. I wanted to put her to sleep, so she wouldn’t know I’m gone.But the contractions escalated quickly and by about 9pm, had started coming every 15 mins. My mom in law noticed my state and insisted that leave for the hospital. We were reluctant, but quickly got on our feet and were on our way!

We bid a difficult goodbye to our daughter and left for the hospital at about 10pm. But the difficult part had just begun. My contractions were so painful that even the journey to the hospital was really tough. We reached the hospital around 10:45 and started the formalities of settling into our room.

By now I was juggling between sensations of peeing, passing motions, contractions, unable to stand, sit or move. All at once!

Dr. Ameet reached quickly and did an internal check, but he said that I was just 2 centimeters dilated.

The pain amplified and the contractions were 5 mins apart and soon there was no gap between the contractions. It was constant pain and discomfort.

I started moaning in pain. And thanks to my god sent angel husband, he kept massaging my back continuously. I was in so much pain and discomfort that I was unable to assume a proper position. standing, sitting, lying down , everything was uncomfortable. And he continued to massage my back non stop.

The doc by now had started preparing the tub for the water birth and there I was, howling in pain and my doc asked me to stop shouting and conserve my energy.

Another doc came in to check the baby’s heart beat and do an internal check up and exclaimed " the head is still up". This was my breaking point, I didn’t know how long I could handle the tormenting pain.

(I later on did share with my gynac how these statements can affect someone in labour and need not be necessarily communicated to the person in pain)

I felt an urgent sensation to pee, so I went to the loo. From there on I refused to get out. By now Sanam was in. She asked me to come out, but I refused. I was feeling like pushing by now and did pass motions but Sanam said that it's too early to exert so much pressure and could cause membrane tears.

I really really wanted to push now! But she insisted that I come out. I did come out and sat on the birth ball. She massaged my back to relax me, but I ran back in, the urge to push/poop was coming on strong.

I was immensely dehydrated in the process and needed some juice, but I refused to let go of my husband. Labour pains can really make you lose your better judgement.With much difficulty Sanam convinced me to let him go. She held on to my hands.Her energy was amazing. A divine sanction that relaxed me, I could surrender my pain to her as she patiently guided my breathing patterns.

This time Dr. Ameet came for a check up and it was time to get into the tub. Sanam helped me change my clothes for the tub and I was still pushing now. I sipped some orange juice.

The doctor exclaimed that I better hurry up and get in the tub or else I might deliver on the bed. My husband and Sanam helped me walk up to the tub.

The water was relaxing because of its therapeutic nature and maybe because of the re-collective memory from the swimming sessions. Within minutes I pushed and the baby's head was out. The doctor wasn't even ready for such a quick delivery and started reaching out for his gloves.

"Seema come on, one more push and u are done " The best thing I heard all day! But surprisingly,I wasn't really pushing, my body was responding to every call and with another push the baby was out. It was 1am. I went from massive pain to zero pain.

My heart in my hands yet again

I am still dazed as I recollect the exact feeling of holding that baby in my hands. Our beautiful daughter, made her way into this world!

We called her Rumi, A beautiful lady! And that’s exactly how she made me feel!

I breastfed her in the tub itself while cord was still attached and we waited till the pulsations stopped and my husband gently cut the cord.

No induction, no vaccum, a natural tear, no episiotomy, nothing. Our Natural Birth was complete! My dream was fulfilled!

I didn’t much want to pay attention to the post delivery procedure, because my daughter stole my heart and captivated my mind!

I was made to come out of the tub and lie down on bed to deliver the placenta which happened with ease. Then I was taken to the OT and administered the Pitocin, as a bleeding precaution and the minor tear was stitched up. All this, while I continued to breastfeed my baby, I couldn’t stop looking at her, neither could my husband.

Soon we were brought to our room and my husband and I were left alone with this littlest new chapter in our live, Rumi. And continued the journey of sleeping, waking, feeding, rocking, changing etc etc etc.

Acknowledgements

A thank you isn’t enough for all the people who helped me in this journey.

Dr. Vijaya Venkat, Anju Venkat and Shilpa Chawla from The Health Awareness Centre for instilling the belief in nature and its abundance.

My gynac, Dr. Ameet Dhurandhar for letting me make my choices and making birth feel as non medical as possible.

My doula, Sanam Motwani, my bindass girl whom I could lean on in my highest state of discomfort

Ruth Malik, my guiding star!

Midwifes Lina Duncan, Zoe Quinn, Alli Sullivan, Dr. Vijaya Krishnan who answered my questions whenever I was in doubt.

Yasmin- She said, “ Remember the word expansion” a powerful statement that became an auto suggestion during labour.

She also told me that when in labour, I will have the energy of a tigress and that I will definitely achieve what I want. Such statements can do wonders.

My dear friends Raaga, Ritika, Mansi, Kanika who shared their positive birth stories and always stood by me strong and inspired me to experience the most beautiful thing on earth for a woman, NATURAL BIRTH.